My smallie is starting nursery tomorrow and I’m not too sure how I feel about this. I made the decision not to return to work after having her, so apart from the odd weekend away from us with family, she has essentially been in my care full time from day dot. Right now, I feel like she needs some time away from me. She is not a clingy child but she has regressed in recent weeks and currently can’t bear me to walk up the stairs without holding her hand, and often demands that I hold her and pick her up. At the same time, she won’t listen to a single thing I say, she needs me but she also rebels, oh the confusion! Because of this, I know that having some of the structure that the nursery will bring, will be really good for her, but despite knowing she needs this, there’s a small part of me (okay it’s a big part) that doesn’t want her to go at all! Is that normal?
It’s been a turbulent few weeks for the two of us. The kid has reached a point where she is demanding so much more from me, leaving us both frustrated and angry at times. I do a lot with her to keep her occupied, more than enough in fact. She’s a very physical little girl so I need to get her out in the fresh air at least once a day otherwise she goes stir crazy. We see friends and family regularly, she has plenty of play dates, and I often take her to National Trust places or the park for a run around, but she needs more. Probably about three or four months ago was the turning point, when all of a sudden there was a change and now needs more to keen her little mind busy (and boy does she have a busy little mind)
She is an active, fast paced little girl and she is completely ready for nursery. The right environment that will do all those fun crafty things that I never will at home (sorry, but I most certainly am not a crafty mum *laughs hysterically*) At nursery, she can paint and craft to her hearts content. The turbulence that we’ve both been experiencing I hope will begin to subside slightly (I’m not an idiot, I know it won’t go away completely) and I hope we begin to enjoy each others company fully again. I am excited for her to begin this new milestone in her little life, this is the beginning really isn’t it, next stop school, university, total independence?! She will wholeheartedly love nursery and not miss me a jot I’m sure, and I’m sure that tomorrow I will weep into my Cappuccino froth feeling like my heart might burst, even though I know that at the moment she drives me slightly bananas and that the time apart will be good. Because she’s my baby, isn’t she. The next time she goes I will feel better about it, and the next, and the next. Until tomorrow little one, a new exciting day awaits.